“Don’t be so fearful of failing.” -Shirley Owens
Failure is a blessing in disguise. We learn when we fail. At least if we choose to! Shirley’s conversation with Jay brings out failure in a positive light. Shirley, while in a hotel room in NYC, worries about her own possible failures, reflects on the wonderful benefits we can get from learning from our mistakes and mishaps. They’re not necessarily good experiences but failures can teach us valuable lessons that we can not learn otherwise.
01:00 “What If I Fail?”
03:00 Positive Failure
04:04 “Each time I failed, I learned something from it and I was able to go back and try it again without doing the same thing twice.” -Shirley Owens
04:23 “Don’t be so fearful of failing.” -Shirley Owens
04:31 “If there’s anything that I don’t do perfectly, I’m just going to learn from it.” -Shirley Owens
Connect With Jay:
A member of Forbes Coaches Council, Jay Rooke, J.D., is a trained executive and business coach who resides in wine country in Sonoma, California. Jay spent the first half of his life on the East Coast where he worked as a toxic tort litigator for the City of New York, as well as helping Merck pharmaceuticals launch the first-ever anticancer vaccine. He attended culinary school in New York City, and later opened his own restaurant in California. Prior to coaching, he most recently worked for NBC Sports; he also has experience working in the clean tech, sustainability and wine industries. Jay is the Co-Founder of GivingKicks.com, a charitable initiative to provide 1,000 shoes to 1,000 underprivileged kids when they go back to school in the fall.
Shirley Owens: Hello and welcome back to Get What You Want Podcast. Shirley here, and I'm actually sitting in a hotel room in New York City, it's freezing cold, but yesterday we got to see some snow flurries, and coming from Phoenix, that was a big treat. So I wanted to reflect on my conversation with Jay Rooke, and one of the things that we have been talking about is failure and how important it is for success, and how a lot of people haven't experienced failure, so it's hard for them when they finally do experience it because it kind of rocks their world a little bit. And it's interesting because I actually had a show this morning and I was a nervous wreck, I kept thinking, what happens if I fail? What does it look like if I fail? And how embarrassing is it going to be because it was a live show.
And my hubby texted me and said, how are you feeling this morning? And I told him: "I was super nervous." And he said: "Worst case, you're exactly where you are. You got the babe." And for a moment, that made me feel better. But then the fear came in again, and I was like, wait, what if I fail though, that I'm not where I am? I'm like worse than where I am. So anyway, I had my friends with me and they somehow talked me out of my nerves a little bit, and we showed up to this place, and we're in the pouring rain in the streets of New York. And then I'm worried about what I'm going to look like, and all of the other things that keep coming up. And then I really, we went into the building and started talking to Paul [inaudible], who was the guy who interviewed me, and it was just such a great experience because I forgot that I was there doing what I was doing, and I didn't fail.
And I got through it all, and it was really good. Here we are back in the hotel room, and I have my friend Jeanie here with me and I didn't even want to do my reflection in front of her because the same thing, like, what if I fail? And this whole purpose of this reflection today is talking about how positive failure is. So even if I fail, I'm just going to keep talking, somehow I'm going to learn something from it, and it'll be perfect. So anyway, that's what I want to talk about today was failure. If you think of any person who has been amazing in life, made it, famous, greatest athletes, Walt Disney, anyone you can think of, they have failed, time and time, and time again. I have a daughter who is a D1 scholarship athlete, gymnast at ASU, and I was thinking about how many times she fell off the high bar, how many times she fell off the beam, and the floor, and just so many crashes, and she is amazing.
And it just took getting up each time learning what it was that made her fall, and then she corrected it until she became really, really good at what she does. And that's kind of like me with my past relationships too. I feel like each time I failed, I learned something from it, and I was able to go back and try it again without doing the same thing twice.
“Each time I failed, I learned something from it and I was able to go back and try it again without doing the same thing twice.” -Shirley Owens
So today, I want you guys to think about the times that you've failed while you've learned about it, and also think about, in the future, don't be so fearful of failing.
“Don’t be so fearful of failing.” -Shirley Owens
I'm going to take that. I have another show tomorrow. I'm not going to be nervous, or at least I'm going to try not to be nervous. And if there's anything that I don't do perfectly, I'm just going to learn from it.
“If there’s anything that I don’t do perfectly, I’m just going to learn from it.” -Shirley Owens
I hope that you all are warm today because I'm still freezing, and I will talk to you next Tuesday. Go create